I want...

a webcam
a new laptop
a new handphone
a new life

aiming to achieving

license for *****

Shhh... it's a secret for now, until I get it.

-

It wasn't such a good day today. It pour cats and dogs while on my way to work. My jeans were soaking wet. *Sob* Worst, it stop raining once I reach the office. *Double Sob* Discovered my table with food stains. So angry. Clean up my table a bit and shift things here and there. Sastisfaction. *Smiles* The day goes by as usual, with time running slowly.

Soon, the month of May is going to end. Soon, the month of June will start. Soon, it'll be our 1 year anniversary. But, that day will never come. Is it because I was pratically living and breathing for him and neglecting everything else? So he was taken away from me, so I can discover a new life, to learn to live independently? Maybe so... but I'm not so brave, I'm not so strong. Why give me such a cruel ending? I wonder what is worst, knowing he dun love you anymore, or knowing he cannot love you anymore? Life is like a game, either you strive and win or crumble and lose. *Sigh*

Can I say I'm getting better? Cause I still miss him dearly...

Just got back home not too long ago from Movie and Supper with Cheryl and Matt. Shrek 3 is freaking funny. I din think I watch Shrek 2, and I caught Shrek on tv. Spend one and a half hours laffing and yawning. Lack of sleep = lack of oxygen in brain = numerous yawning. Supper was at this TangShuiCafe? Opp Great World City. Quite an interesting place. Tired evening but nontheless, an enjoyable one. At least I had company.

I wonder if I'll ever stop thinking of him. Memories everywhere... I wonder if he feels the same?

Bangkok Photos! (pss.. yilin, where are our class photos btw?)... Enjoy!


On the way to Bangkok...


It was raining when we landed in Bangkok


The airport is big, but empty




I dun like trance music...


Lovely washroom...


Sleepy, tired, a little too much alcohol in my blood


Breakfast in the hotel






Street Hawker...




Our transportation






The BIG washroom signage




The sky train, or LRT?


The chandelier is made out of wine glasses hung upside down


Bali style washroom


This lady can sing. One of the violinist is pretty. I miss my violin.


Band called FEAR. The singer is called Mue. He's cute!


Banana is good for health


MTV!


I'm having good hair day... yes?


Food... at Amazing Thailand Sale at some Convention Hall


Big... but nothing much inside


Thailand's Ronald MacDonald


Eating Japanese Food in Bangkok doesn't sound right.

Helo peeps, I just got back home from Jurong, yin's place after dinner + mahjong. I'm freaking tired. So many major things happening in such a short time. Wave after wave. I'm so gonna crash if something horrible happens in the next 3 months. Gimme a break. I need to get well. Life is like a box of chocolate eh, well, the box of chocolates I got have expired. Rotten and such. Someone get me a new box of chocolate? No...? I forgot, I have to be independent now, I shall fight for it myself.

我回来了。虽然不是很好玩，可是让我看看外面的世界，以后可以带我的好朋友一起去。没拍很多照片，有心情再整理吧。去了曼谷，淋了雨，生病了。昨天拿了病假，今天还是有点不舒服。生病不好玩！

Good morning everyone. Today will be a brand new day, all problems are left for yesterdays and yesteryears. Everything will be alright from today onwards, I will put on a smile and move on.

谁来安慰这破碎的心？好痛。。。

明天就要飞了。心情却越来越惧伤。越来越想他。昨晚又哭了一夜，眼睛竟然肿了起来。好痛。今天搭巴士回家时竟然坐过站。我是怎么了。

Work is bad.


Lotsa late charge to do. Lotsa shit to clear.


This is rsvn's pile of paper.

I wanna get out of my position asap.

Uiks! Look at the time. Back from Movie 'Fantasic 4' at Vivocity with Cheryl, Matt and Chris. The seats are spacious!! And the screen is BIG. The movie was not bad. We had dinner at White Dog Cafe. Followed by drinks at Mount Faber. The view is fantasic. Shall ask fen and lin to go next time, if we can find some transportation that is. Anyhow, I'm super tired. There's work tml. Shall update more next time. Night!

Chill out at Pacific Cafe, Vivocity


I love this gal...


The swing!


The pretty gals...


Yummy...

I woke up late yesterday for work. Spend the whole day at the counter clearing the crowd. Had dinner with my poly ex-classmates at Rice Table. Our lecturer tot it was called Rice Bowl. Equal dot equal. Chill out at Arab Street, Supper at Lavender Food Court. Home at 2 plus. Photos up after Yilin transfer to me.

Just got back from Dinner at Vivo with Fen, Lin, Yin followed by Supper at Tiong Bahru Road with Ash, Matt, Cheryl. So shag. I've got work in the morning and class gathering dinner tomorrow. More updates later, after I get sufficient sleep.

这首歌说出我的心深:

背叛　
曲:曹格词:阿丹、邬裕康
编曲:涂惠源

雨 不停落下来
花 怎么都不开
尽管我细心灌溉 你说不爱就不爱
我 一个人欣赏悲哀
爱 只剩下无奈
我 一直不愿再去猜
钢琴上黑键之间 永远都夹着空白
缺了一块 就不精采

紧紧相依的心如何Say goodbye
你比我清楚还要我说明白
爱太深会让人 疯狂的勇敢
我用背叛自己 完成你的期盼
把手放开不问一句Say goodbye
当作最后一次对你的溺爱
冷冷清清淡淡今后都不管
只要你能 愉快

有一句感慨
还能够跟谁对白
在你关上门之前
替我再回头看看
那些片段 还在不在

So I had my monthly credit meeting yesterday. It was really bad, cos the pending accounts are over 60++. Normally we get an average of 20 to 30 of them. Pending accounts means the guest has left the hotel but money has not been paid for. Either lack of black and white supporting or whichever other reason you can think of. So, I had to go thru each account one by one and get whack by the management. It wasn't soo bad until when it was finally over, our credit controller had to make a speech. He was in fact speaking up for me, that it's very unfair for me to be clearing all these shit and stuff, by then I was almost in tears already becos everyone was looking at me like 'poor thing' and stuff. Den our Executive Assistant Manager had to make a follow up speech. I was in fact touched and such. All the frustration and stress that I'm facing, people are actually speaking on my behalf. The last straw came when our Director of Sales who happens to be sitting beside me tried to console me. My tears just roll out. So embarrassing can. Breaking down in front of all the big shots. Even the head office people was around. Damn. Lucky my AFOM saved me with his tissue. Haa.. which guy carries tissue around? It was in a cute recyclable packet btw.

In the evening, something more depressing happen. I felt sooo down for a moment there. Lucky there's a friend beside me. We talked about it, consoled ourselves, look at the bright side, and felt abit better before heading home. I was so tired cos it was around like 2330hrs and I need to travel all the way back home. But I just couldn't sleep on the train. So many thoughts running thru my mind. Such a long day I had.

Today wasn't as bad. Suddenly the sales dept were soo helpful, not that they're not helpful but I guess everyone's got their own stuff to do but they help me cleared alot of work today. Next week will be the CommunicAsia week. Lotsa MICE group, Lotsa Corporate Guest, we're looking at full house for a few days straight with high paying guest. As high as S$500+++ per room night guest?! Yes. The whole town will be full and we're expecting lotsa revenue to come in. It's gonna be busy busy busy. And straight after the convention is over, I'm packing my bag and leaving for a short trip to Bangkok. Yes, I heard it's getting messy and dangerous there. It's an experience still.

I met fen for dinner today. Suppose to get my eyebrows done but since the toopid shop close so early, and my working hours sux, fen had to go alone and get hers all pretty up. We ate at Long John Silver opp The Cathedral Church before walking down to Bugis. Shop abit here and there but din find anything that nice. Besides, I'm leaving for Bangkok next Friday, should keep whatever cash I have left for the trip. We sat down at Starbucks and did our talking. About him, and him. I guess talking does help abit for both of us to move on. To share what we've been through and to learn. We said our goodbyes and parted. I initially wanted to take the train back home, since there's no bus service nearby that reaches my place. Den I started walking away from the train station and just walked...


我们承走过的街。。。


你拜的庙。还深深的记得你的背影，低着头，诚恳地祈祷着。


在这停着你的心爱的摩托车。


在那吃过无数的肖夜。。。


你承把车停在这停车场


我们承第一次试吃这 Sing Ho Hainese Chicken Rice shop。


一起喝着饮料的咖啡座。


all by myself now...

It's nice taking a walk with my ipod.

Anyway, bought this to pamper yours truely...

昨天没去上班，肚子不舒服，去看医生。原来又是胃痛。奇怪，这几天都吃很多啊。可能吃太多吧。咳！

On MC today. Got mild gastric.

Met up with Liana and Andi after work today. Head to Little India to eat Dosa. I had Paper Dosa. But I can't even finish half of it. Darn... we felt like tourist there especially when Andi wipe out his camera. Plus, it was my first time walking down Little India Road. Shame on me for being a singaporean for 23 years. The experience was refreshing, and it wasn't as scary as what people describe. But, I still think going there in groups is safer.

The other day, my colleague Angel was asking me where Haw Par Villa is cause she wanna go there. She's from Penang btw. And I told her I've never been there before. Shame on me for being a singaporean for 23 years. Hee... ok, maybe I've been there when I was a kid? Just can't remember.

I seriously need to start exploring singapore. It isn't that big afterall.

I had MacDonald's Large Seaweek Shakers Fries + Ice Milo @ 8.30pm, Rice + Steam Chicken Drumstick + Mango + Yakult @ 10.30pm. Waiting for Matt to pick me up for Supper at Jalan Kayu @ 11.30pm. I'm so getting fat...

Alright, so I went to work today. But it ended bad. Feeling so fustrated by the work I'm doing, fustrated with the people I work with, fustrated with the situation I'm in. Must be the PMS. I need tons of chocolate. I wanna go on a roadtrip. Anyone wanna drive me around?

Can't wait to get back to work. At least, it takes my mind off things.

Horoscope

SCORPIO - The Addict
EXTREMELY adorable. Intelligent. Loves to joke. Very Good sense of humour. Energetic. Predict future. GREAT kisser. Always get what they want. Attractive. Easy going. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. Romantic. Caring.

VIRGO - The One that Waits
Dominant in relationships. Someone loves them right now. Always wants the last word. Caring. Smart. Loud. Loyal. Easy to talk to. Everything you ever wanted. Easy to please. The one and only.

LIBRA - The Lame One
Nice to everyone they meet. Their Love is one of a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Have own unique appeal. Most caring person you will ever meet! however not the kind of person you wanna mess with ... u might end up crying...

ARIES - The Liar
Outgoing. Lovable. Spontaneous. Not one to mess with. Funny. Excellent kisser EXTREMELY adorable. Loves relationships, Addictive. Loud.

AQUARIUS - Does It In The Water
Trustworthy. Attractive. Great kisser. One of a kind. Loves being in long-term relationships. Extremely energetic. Unpredictable. Will exceedyour expectations. Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights out.

GEMINI - Irresistible
Nice. Love is one of a kind. Great listeners Very Good in the you knowwhere... Lover not a fighter, but will still knock you out. Trustworthy. Always happy. Loud. Talkative. Outgoing VERY FORGIVING. Loves to make out. Has a beautiful smile. Generous. Strong. THE MOST IRRESISTIBLE.

LEO - The Lion
Great talker. Attractive and passionate. Laid back. Knows how to have fun. Is really good at almost anything. Great kisser. Unpredictable. Outgoing. Down to earth. Addictive. Attractive. Loud. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. Not one to mess with. Rare to find. Good when found.

CANCER - The Cutie
MOST AMAZING KISSER. Very high appeal. Love is one of a kind. Very romantic. Most caring person you will ever meet! Entirely creative. Extremely random and proud of it. Freak. Spontaneous. Great telling stories. Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights out if it comes down to it. Someone you should hold on to.

PISCES - The Partner for Life
Caring and kind. Smart. Center of attention. High appeal. Has the lastword. Good to find, hard to keep. Fun to be around. Extremely weird but in agood way. Good Sense of Humor!!! Thoughtful. Always gets what he or shewants. Loves to joke. Very popular. Silly, fun and sweet.

CAPRICORN - The Passionate Lover
Love to bust. Nice. Sassy. Intelligent. Sexy. Predict future. Irresistible. Loves being in long relationships. Great talker. Always gets what he or she wants. Cool. Loves to own Gemini's in sports. Extremely fun. Loves to joke. Smart.

TAURUS - The Tramp
Aggressive. Loves being in long relationships. Likes to give a good fight for what they want. Extremely outgoing. Loves to help people in times of need. Good kisser. Good personality. Stubborn. A caring person. One of a kind. Not one to mess with. Are the most attractive people on earth!

SAGITTARIUS - The Promiscuous One
Spontaneous. High appeal. Rare to find. Great when found. Loves being inlong relationships. So much love to give. Not one to mess with. Very pretty. Very romantic. Nice to everyone They meet. Their Love is one of a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Have own unique appeal. Most caring person you will ever meet! Amazing in the you know where..!!! Not the kind of person you wanna mess with-you might end up crying.

I slept at 3am last night and woke up at 10am in the morning. It's insane. Back to youtube, watching 恶作剧之吻. I have no life watsoever.

所有的天蝎都孤独

Got this off some random blog:

没有一个蝎子不孤独的，而且他们害怕孤独，却享受孤独的滋味。每过一段时间都要去自己单独的呆一会，他们这个时候会反省自己以前一段时间里做做的一切对于自己现在来说是对还是错误的！不过，他们并不渴望孤独，相反，他们渴望的是有人可以把他从孤独里带出来，所以他们会异常的珍惜他们的朋友和爱人，因为只有和真的朋友在一起的时候蝎子才不会感到孤独，因为他们投入的特点，所以蝎子都会十分的厌恶背叛和欺骗！他们在朋友面前,活力四射,曲终人散后,便有伤感起来.他们不会去背叛和欺骗自己的朋友，同样，他们也同样的要求自己的朋友和爱人不可以背叛自己，欺骗自己。

Byul (Star)

Translation taken from Byul, soundtrack of 200 Pounds Beauty. 2nd song in my playlist.

"the wind is shaking the windows,and over my small room,
the stars fill up the sky, shining brightly too many to count,
the stars reassure tired me
they wipe away the many tears that are deep inside me

don’t be hurt too much..they hug me tight and pamper me
and comfort me, telling me to go to sleep

though I’m exhausted to the point where I can’t walk
though my tears blur my vision
I’ll still smile in front of my love that I’m not able to get

Even though our happy times were short,
I’ll treasure it deep inside my heart
like those countless number of stars, forever

My dream is coming. though it is unusual that my one star is bright
it is very bright, even blinding..it comes down to my shoulder
stop being so sad..it holds my hand as it touches me
and gives me a warm hug

though I’m exhausted to the point where I can’t walk
though my tears blur my vision
I’ll still smile in front of my love that I’m not able to get

Even though our happy times were short,
I’ll treasure it deep inside my heart
like those countless number of stars, forever

Only for today, I won’t cry though my eyes fill with tears
I want to laugh like those stars
Oh~ I want to cherish all my happy moments deep inside my heart
Like those countless number of stars, forever"

大家有没有在听我播的歌啊？有没有读我放的词啊？没有的话，该打！哈哈，开完笑的啦。最近心情好很多了吧。近量不去想不开心的事情，这样比较好吧？我也不清楚耶。我可以算是幸运的吧，虽然不能再像以前一样，可是还能见面，还能感受到他的关心。或许不是情人，而是一个好朋友的关心，我也心满意足了吧。

对我而言，要从悲伤好起来不容易。可是不能辜负家人已朋友的关怀。伤心后，也要打算怎么走下去。所以要打算做些怎么吧。生活有了目标会比较不会那么迷失方向。比如，丽芬阿，去学游泳吧！哈哈。我知道一些身旁的朋友也在伤心。五月已经过了，让六月带给大家多一些快乐吧！